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Rick Perry has exciting news to announce!

What could it possibly be?

Corndogs make good news go down easier

Maybe he’ll profess his love for corndogs

Rick Perry is inviting close friends and supporters to an event next Monday in San Antonio where he is expected to announce if he plans to seek an unprecedented fourth full term as Texas governor, CNN has learned.

Perry “will be making an announcement around mid-day in San Antonio concerning his exciting future plans,” according to a “Save the Date” email obtained Tuesday by CNN. The announcement comes as Perry finds himself at the center of a high-profile legislative fight over abortion rights in his state.

“Please join his family and closest friends on July 8th,” reads the email, which is being circulated to his political allies. “Details to follow.”

Perry has long said he will make a decision about his political future after the conclusion of this year’s legislative session, but because Democrats blocked the abortion measure with an attention-grabbing filibuster by state Sen. Wendy Davis last week, the governor was forced to call another session to tackle that issue and others.

Originally, Perry was supposed to announce his 2014 plans this week.

Anyone want to guess what the announcement will be? Perhaps it’s one of the following:

1. He expects to receive millions of dollars from a Nigerian prince that had emailed him asking for his assistance. The money will be used to help lure businesses from New York and California.

2. He’s the new spokesmodel for BrylCreem.

3. He will be selling all his possessions and giving the money to the poor, just as Jesus instructed his followers to do in the Bible.

Ha ha, no. He’d never do any of those ridiculous things. The speculation there and in the Trib and the Chron is that he will be announcing that he is not running for re-election in 2014 but will be launching another Presidential campaign. I’ve heard something similar from a friend who has some insider connections, and who also said that Greg Abbott will follow that up the week after with the least surprising news in the world about his candidacy to succeed Perry. Are you excited yet? Campos, who has some other career suggestions for Perry, Texpatriate, Jason Stanford, Juanita, and Concerned Citizens have more.

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6 Comments

  1. I was hoping he was going to become a live-fire target dummy for a reincarnated Charles Whitman.

  2. […] Kuffer has a good take on the Dude announcement. […]

  3. John says:

    I think he will take over as head of NRA. Makes perfect sense, I am sure his advisors have told him after 2012 nobody will take him serious for another presidential run in 2016. But if he runs the NRA he can still have his ego stroked by being in the spotlight.

  4. Linkmeister says:

    “the governor was forced to call another session to tackle that issue and others.”

    Well, no. Nobody forced him but the voices in his head. He could have let it go.

  5. joshua ben bullard says:

    if hes going,it sure wont be due to the fact that charles kuffner has been verbally blasting the guy for the last 6 years,taking a random unsighted shot at every opportunity,i got to hand it to old kuffner,hes dedicated however, when it came to perry his dedication was mere pebbles in the sand,the real explaination is there is a shift in the gop party state wide,its out with the old and in with the new,a changing of the guards if you must..

    joshua ben bullard

  6. […] week Perry announced he had something to announce. Since then, people have been speculating. Most Texas watchers supposed he would be doing as he did. It humored me that CNN reported in the other […]

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