Viagra gum

Posted on June 17, 2003 by Charles Kuffner

You know, I just haven’t been getting enough hits off of search engine queries lately. This ought to help.

Seeking to maximize its “Double Your Pleasure” slogan, gum maker Wrigley has filed for a patent to cover gum that contains the active ingredient in Viagra, Pfizer’s impotence drug.

Snarky comments are left as an exercise for the reader.

UPDATE: Note to self: “Viagra” is not a one-letter variation of “Niagara”. Thanks, Ikram.

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6 Responses to Viagra gum

  1. Ikram Saeed says:
    June 17, 2003 at 5:09 pm

    Viagara?

    Now you corner get the impotent-men-who-cannot-spell-and-like-to-chew-gum demographic. More power to you.

  2. William Hughes says:
    June 17, 2003 at 5:57 pm

    Why do I get the feeling that this will not be in the 5 sticks in a pack for 25 cents section at my local 7-11?

  3. William Hughes says:
    June 17, 2003 at 6:05 pm

    Here’s some slogans for Viagra Gum:

    1. It’s as hard a rock, and you will be too,
    When you try the new gum all men want to chew.

    2. Is your gum losing its flavor? Is it difficult any sensation of flavor in your mouth? Do you find it difficult to keep it up once you start chewing?

    Well, we’ve got a gum for you!

    Try Viagra Gum, the new minty flavored treat for your mouth. Not only will the flavor last, but so will your libido!

    3. Feel the pleasure of Viagra Gum all night long! The flavor lasts an extra long time!

    Good taste prevents me from using some of my other ideas.

  4. Charles M says:
    June 17, 2003 at 11:49 pm

    A patent? What, for God’s sake, isn’t obvious about adding a adulterant to chewing gum?

    And I thought software patents were absurd.

  5. Patrick says:
    June 18, 2003 at 8:40 am

    I understand it can have some pretty nasty side effects. Apparently sometimes it makes you tongue stick straight out of your mouth and hard as a stone. If I’m Gene Simmons, I’m proceeding with caution.

  6. Patrick says:
    June 18, 2003 at 8:43 am

    Why do I get the feeling that this will not be in the 5 sticks in a pack for 25 cents section at my local 7-11?

    Probably not, but you likely already have 8 emails telling you how you can get it over the internet for half the drugstore price.

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