Want to know how to insult a student at one of Texas’ many universities? Check out The Voorn Project for some ammunition. It’s pretty funny, and I’m pleased to see that the creator took the time to include smaller schools, such as my alma mater.
TRINITY UNIVERSITY
I live in a town so Mexican that we cancel classes at 3:00 pm every day to take a siesta. My parents have money. I’m in a fraternity or sorority. Dorks are allowed. I was really smart in high school. I was kind of weird too. Our mascot is the Tiger because everything else in Texas was taken. I watch football games from my dorm balcony. Far West is the place to be. I don’t steal because I own everything. I have had my SUV here at school since my freshman year. I have a papasan chair in my room. My tuition is so high that both grandfathers had to go fight for more GI Bills to pay for it. I probably have a scholarship too. I’m not originally from Texas. Who is the governor of Texas right now? I will probably move to the mid-west after graduation. Longhorns are slackers. What’s an Aggie? Sea World? We have a Sea World?? I went to Six Flags Fiesta my senior year when I visited the school. Haven’t been back since. I’ve tried drugs but never got hooked. Homosexuality is way okay. I used to be Presbyterian, until the school dropped the covenant, now I don’t really go to church. War is not cool, but I guess it doesn’t matter, as long as I don’t have to go to boot camp.
I’m a Tiger.
Other than the fraternity/sorority part (when I was there from 84-88, they constituted maybe 25% of the student body – any more recent students want to take a guess on what it’s like now?), that’s pretty scarily accurate. Oh, and we were supposed to call the dorms “residence halls”. Not that I usually did – too many syllables.
I’m getting the sudden urge to bail on my job this afternoon, run by TC for a couple of bean and cheeses before heading over to some tennis courts to watch a tennis team while I catch a few rays.
Ahh those halycon days of youth…..
For Rice, I would amend the bit about the Pub to “The Pub is overrated. Valhalla is better.” And for SWT, they should note that no one can remember what the school’s new name is.
The Rice one is awesome.